So much has been going on my life lately.. It had been pretty darn crazy.. and one big mess and heart ache after another.
For starters, a lot of changes are happening at my church, starting with losing our youth pastor. I have volunteered with this youth group for quite sometime now, and i can’t even begin to describe the hurt and confusion that is taking place right now. I do know that God is in complete control and will bring all of us out of this stronger and more faithful people. It just kills me to see the hurt and confusion in these kids who were just starting to trust and take deeper steps into their faith. But maybe that was Gods plan? Get there feet wet get them excited, and then put them through a hard time to show them his amazing grace, love, and just how much he truly cares about them.
This youth group has done wonders for me… even after i graduated. They have been my family, my friends, my shoulders to cry on, the people i have given my all too. they have seen me at my worst, and at my best, yet they are the people who have accepted me for 100% of everything i am. And i can not tell you of any other place other then Gods own hands that i have ever felt that. I am truly so proud of the students and just the way they love everyone, and accept everyone and anyone that would walk into the doors of our small student ministries buildings. The way they cared for each other was just an amazing thing to watch.
God did not put me in this place just so that the students could learn from me, but so that i could learn from these students as well. If it weren’t for them i would not have the strong relationship with Jesus that i now have. They have brought out my passion and made clear what my future is. If it weren’t for these kids I would not have realized how much i passionately love working and helping the youth. And I can not wait to take what i have learned from you guys and become a youth pastor!
About a month ago I traveled up north to go and visit my granddaddy, to say our goodbyes. the most amazing and incredible thing happened the night before we left to go up there.. This strong, stubborn man accept Jesus as his Lord and Savior, and gave his life to Christ. I can not tell you how incredible that was for me and my family, just to know that we will get to see him again. My granddaddy was a great man, and such a great granddaddy. He lived and incredible and full life! on may 18th, this great man went to go and be with his creator. And i know very much so that he is looking down on me and watching over me.
I have never lost a loved one before, in fact i only know one other person that has died. Yea i have heard of people dying but i have never known them directly or met them. So this is definitely one of the hardest things i have ever had to go through. I miss my granddaddy every day. I never lived close to him, and i didn’t get to see him often but when ever i did it was always such a blast. My granddaddy was seriously a really cool guy with awesome stories from his childhood. I remember one summer i went up north to see him, and we went fishing and i was so bored by it, it still is not my favorite thing to do and i find it boring… but i still am so happy that he wanted to share that with me. something i will always always cherish.
Life is really rough at times.. but its great to know that God is always there for me, and has given me some long lasting friendships to get me through.
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